Shaadi, Marriage & Family - By Prof. A. Shafi Ahmed Khan - Ambur
Marriage has the main objective as bringing up one's individual family. Man is a social animal but he needs a society to groom and live and thus marriage is one of the basic requisites for a good life on this globe. The ancient man had understood this concept many centuries ago and thus he started living in the family. The families came in to existence from the time immemorial due to marriages, as these are very necessary for the best lives. Man can be distinguished from the other animals only on the aspect of family and wedding. Even there are lot of birds and animals in the world that take care of their off springs in a better manner. Wedding is arranged by the elders of the family to bring out the children who are necessary for the family. The main purpose of any legal matrimony is to develop family and to groom and shelter the children. Many religions have made marriage as an obligation for the spread of generations. Celibacy is also opposed in many religions of the world. Prophet Mohamed says those who neglect marriages are not belong to the community of Muslims. The prophet of Islam considers marriage is obligatory for every Muslim male and female to groom the family and so that the generations on the earth continue to prosper. The great philosophers of the world believe that marriage is one of the prerequisites for the human beings. Man cannot live by bread alone even though he is born and die in solitude but he needs a family to dwell on this earth in his lifetime. So marriage is needed to develop a family. It is rightly pointed out that man is born free but everywhere he is in chain. Thus, family becomes an inevitable aspect of his life. So wedding becomes a necessary tradition to bring out a good family. Good families depend on good marriages. Family is a basic social group united through bonds of kinship or marriage. Family provides its members the protection, companionship, security, and socialization. The structures of the family vary from society to society. The nuclear family consists of two adults, male and female through their legal marriage and their children. The nuclear family in some societies extended family that consists of grandparents. When parents arrange marriage for their children then they also accompany to live in the family. A third family unit is the single parent family as they united through marriage but they do not take the burden of children as the children live with an unmarried, divorced, or widowed mother or father. This family system is very rapidly spreading in the developed countries where marriage has become an extravagance; a pastime and people do marriages for some contract periods or for merry making. Anthropologists and social scientists have developed several theories about how family structures and functions evolved. In Prehistoric period two or three nuclear families usually linked through bonds of kinship, banded together for part of the year but dispersed into separate nuclear units in those seasons when food was scarce. Their marriages took place and people enjoyed their marital living. Some anthropologists contend that prehistoric people were monogamous. The modern social scientists assert that the modern Western family developed largely from that of the ancient Hebrews, whose families were patriarchal. Marriages are the sources for linking the various families together. The matrimonial lives give much burden for the parents. The family resulting from the Greeco-Roman culture of marriage was also patriarchal and bound by strict religious precepts. Their marriages are very much traditionally bounded. In Christianity, marriage and childbearing became central concerns in religious teaching. Most Western nations now recognize the family relationship as primarily a civil matter. In India family systems start with the advent of civilizations and many good customs of marriage had been developed. Wedding has been considered as an auspicious custom and thus they select good time, auspicious enough to perform the matrimony. Historical studies have proved beyond doubt that family structure has been less changed by urbanization and industrialization. It is as needed as it was at one time. Thus majority of the world people believe in weddings. Many people go and search for various aspects in the matrimonial sites for the right choice. The nuclear family was the most prevalent in the pre-industrial days and is still the basic family structure in most modern industrial societies. The modern family differs from earlier traditional forms in its functions, composition, and life cycle, and also in the roles of mothers and fathers. The main requisite of the family is the affection and emotion between the husband and wife after their marriage and the children that are produced through their marriage. The children through the wedding keep the family ties intact in the world. The matrimonial couples and their children never separated whatever be the situations in the family but the matrimonial couples with no responsibilities of children may desist their matrimonial life at any time. The family is still responsible for the socialization of children, but now the influence of peers and of the mass media has assumed a larger role. Family composition in industrial societies has changed dramatically since the onset of the Industrial Revolution. The women avoid becoming pregnant after the marriage in the industrial societies. A family depends more on matrimonial couples and children through that matrimony. The average number of children born to a woman in the United States has fallen from 7.0 in 1800 to 2.1 by 2000. In the United Kingdom, the average in 2000 was 1.7 children, compared to 3.5 children in 1900. The number of years separating the births of the youngest and oldest children has also declined. The matrimonial couples must show a keen interest in the productions and upbringings of the children. These developments are due to ongoing changes in women's roles. Rising expectations of personal gratification through marriage and family, together with easier divorce and increasing employment opportunities for women, have contributed to a rise in the divorce rate in the West. In the United States and United Kingdom nearly fifty percent of the marriages had been divorced in 2000. In 1970 the prototypical nuclear family had given rise to single-parent family, the stepfamily, and the family without children. One-parent families in the past were usually due to the result of the death of a partner or a spouse but now it is due to divorce also. A stepfamily is created by a new marriage of a single parent. In a stepfamily, problems in relations between non-biological parents and children may generate tension; the difficulties can be especially great in the marriage of single parents when the children of both parents live together as siblings. Families without children may be increasingly the result of deliberate choice on the part of the partners or spouses to keep themselves free from the burden of children through the contraceptive methods. In the developed countries, couples after marriage, often elect to have no children or to postpone having them until their careers are well established. More unmatrimonial couples are living together, before marriage or without legal wedding in the modern world. Similarly some elderly couples, most often widowed, are finding it more economically practical to cohabit without proper marriages. Thus many new trends in family systems and marriages are widely seen in the modern world.
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